Eggslut: Don't Come When You're Hungry.

For The Eggslut Line might I suggest you bring a book?

When I first moved to LA no one went downtown. If they did, they were nervous. Or there was a story. Or they were going to volunteer. And they hated the streets - hated driving. No one seemed to live there, eat there, shop there--go there. 

Park your bike outside of the GCM

And yet there were always people who'd say, "It's really fun downtown" or "You ever think of living there? There're some really nice lofts." Well, that kind of talk can go on for years and years and years and the few times you give it a chance you're like, "Okay, that was gross" or "Okay, I get it. For these two blocks it was nice but then I'm done" or "The Disney Concert Hall is nice" or "It's funky. What an amazing art scene." But on the regular? Not so much.

The Exterior of Grand Central Market

Then suddenly downtown and the promise of downtown merged into one. For me this occurred about two years ago, though in reality it might have begun in 2003 with The Staples Center and began really peaking starting around 2011. More shops and businesses popped up. Food wasn't in just a two block radius and some of the finest restaurants could be found there (Bestia, Faith & Flower). Combined with the improvement of the city's Metro system, Downtown was easier to get to, easier to leave. And yes, it finally felt like it arrived.  

At that time I was volunteering at an awesome non-profit located by Skid Row (School On Wheels). Because of this I became more comfortable. I drove in and dove in. It's not like I hadn't already found some great stuff: the Library, Wurtschuche, The Lazy Ox Canteen, Mo-Chica, Disney Concert Hall, MOCA... But one night, around when I began this blog, I finally did something truly freeing. I hit The Downtown LA Art Walk (the next one is January 8th) and had one of the best nights of my life. I felt alive. It was exhilarating. It wasn't that all the danger was removed but the city was populated. And it wasn't just for two blocks. It was for stretches and stretches and stretches. 

Since then, I'm a convert. Downtown isn't just one art night, one restaurant or one cool building. And it has the ever so original Grand Central Market, a 98 year old food court, housed in the Homer Laughlin Building on Broadway and 4th. The GCM is the city's largest public market, completely emblematic of who us Angelenos were, are and in ways, will always be.

The Grand Central Market

But I had already been there. And though I'd been hearing about the renovations, how new restaurants had stalls there, there was a lot to choose from. What was worth it? Where to go? What to do? It was kind of overwhelming. 

Then one night, when at one of Mark Peel's pop up restaurants (he's opening a place in the GCM soon enough) he told us about a fantastically named eatery: Eggslut. "Eggslut. Don't you love that? What a great name." I was like, "Egg...what? Slut?" And I thought, That is brilliant. I gotta check that out.

Eggslut started as a food truck in 2011 by Chef Alvin Cailan, a native Angeleno who felt a void for good breakfast in LA. But in early 2014 he brought his very successful Egg biznass to The Grand Central Market. The lines that had once queued for his truck, now were doing so in The GCM. Frankly I'm embarrassed I hadn't heard of it before. Seemed everyone and their mother had. 

My first venture to ES was with my friend Lynda, a Kiwi, who, it turns out, had already been to Eggslut, worships Eggslut, LOVES Eggslut. At the mere mention she was like, "Yes, let's go there. Can't wait." I tumbled downtown, wearing paper on my feet, excited to take the plunge. The paper because I had just gotten a pedi. By the way, the Grand Central Market isn't exactly where you want to wear paper shoes but you know, us girls have to stay coiffed... 

Anyway, Lynda and I were on line, talking about her new boyfriend and chatting it up with the woman in front of us while perusing the menu when I realized we were talking to a stranger. That's the thing about the line at Eggslut: you're going to be there for awhile and you might make friends if you're even remotely friendly. As Angelenos, we're not used to this. We don't know how to do this. We're always in our cars or not wanting to leave our houses or apartments. 

Cave Dwelling Angelenos

But Lynda's from New Zealand and is a journalist and I'm from New York and can't shut up so it was inevitable. Still nothing and no one could interfere with the uber important discussion we were about to make regarding what to order. We knew we had to get three dishes because we had to try as much as possible. Lynda suggested the Slut and The Gaucho. For the life of me, I can't remember the third.

The Slut, for nine bucks, is a coddled egg on a potato puree, served in a glass jar. I seriously almost threw up hearing the glass jar bit. Lynda encouraged me to soldier on. 

The Eggslut Slut, 9 bucks.

As for The Gaucho, Lynda said it was "Amazing" when she had it last. This is how the restaurant describes it:

Seared wagyu tri-tip steak, chimichurri, pickled red onions, shaved manchego cheese and seasoned arugula topped with an over medium egg, in a warm brioche bun

$11.00

tri-tip: Snake River Farms, Boise ID

available after 11:30AM

The Gaucho

Let's start with The Slut. She is sublime. You break that little yolk, mix it with that buttery potato mush stuff and holy mother of God, if you're hungover, you will be in heaven. If you love eggs, you will be in heaven. If you have any taste buds at all, you will be in heaven.

The second dish, The Gaucho, was extremely well designed flavor-wise. The steak is high quality, and I love the combo of spicy arugula with manchego cheese, but truthfully, it's really a bitch to eat. They don't cut up the steak much so you kind of have to be VERY comfortable with the one you're with if you're going to eat this sucker. But really, if you're not comfortable looking a little disgusting, I don't think I even want to know you. 

Like I said, I can't remember dish 3. Didn't take notes. Kind of was in a black out. Which was a shame. Except for the little annoying realization which is: I'd have to go back!

So yesterday, the dreariest day in LA -- it looked like Paris outside without the Paris - I returned. I had plans with my friend, Laurie, who's very encouraging about the blog and thought Eggslutting would be a fun activity for the two of us to do. I love my friends.

This time the line was the line I'd heard about. Lynda and I had only to wait 20 minutes. Yesterday, I think Laurie and I were waiting for 45 before ordering and then it took another 20 for our order to be up.

It was worth the wait.

Laurie was still a bit under the weather from the holidays so we didn't really split our food. I recommended she have the Egg Slut. I decided to go for The Fairfax. Once our food was up, we couldn't find anywhere to sit - the place was packed. 

Started wandering around the market. Nothing. Then a security man eschewed us to the bbq place attached to the other side, near G & B Coffee. I wasn't so sure it was PC but I didn't care. My eggs were getting cold.

We sat down, looked at one another, had that eye contact of: Let's do this. But there was a pause. Listen, a lot rides on when you recommend something to someone and they actually order it. Due to that commitment and neurosis, I had one bite of Laurie's just to make sure it was up to par before she got her post holiday germs all over it. Just to make sure it was good. Swear! No! I'm lying! I just wanted to taste it again! And yes, I can confirm: that one bite was amazing. Yet I'm surprised I have any memory of it as I soon became so immersed in my mess of a Fairfax. In fact I forgot to ask her how she liked her coddled egg until she was almost through with it. This is how she described it: "Comforting and satisfying." 

As any good slut should be.

As for The Fairfax, Sweet Jesus I found my breakfast. It was a sloppy mess of a soft scrambled egg sandwich. The buttery brioche mixed with the cheddar, oy gevalt! And that nice kick of sriracha. Honestly, I'm a decent cook. I really don't understand why I can't make this at home but I can't. I know I can't replicate it. Frankly it's gotta be the butter. I'd never use the amount of butter that I'm sure is used at this restaurant that makes it so freakin good. Which is fine. I'll just come back. 

Run, don't walk

FAIRFAX

soft scrambled eggs, chives, cheddar cheese, caramelized onions and sriracha mayo in a warm brioche bun

$7.00

Considering the volume of people who stand on line daily to egg it (they make close to 500 egg sandwiches per day) I'm shocked with the quality of this dish. I mean this might be the best breakfast in LA. End of story. So yes, damn it, it's worth the wait/weight. That gooey, messy, obscene mixture requires 7 napkins. And you'll need the 3 dollar OJ to wash it down with. And if you're a guy and you like the fantasy of the hot chick who eats the burger and gets it all over her face like in the Carl's Junior ad, bring your date here. You won't be disappointed. Or at least you'll be truly sated while you are being disappointed. 

Oh my God, I totally forgot something else I like about Eggslut.... 

They don't serve decaf! This is my kind of joint!

Happiness is a Warm Egg, bang bang shoot shoot

After we walked around a bit. Took some cool pics... 

The Bradbury Building

Valerie Petit Fours

Angelenos on line at Eggslut

Liquor Store Art

...but I gotta tell you the truth, and I think Laurie would agree, nothing beats that egg.

Eggslut is open 7 days a week, 8am to 4pm. It's located on the Broadway side of the market. You can find parking right in The Grand Central Building, entrance on 3rd & Hill. But know that the first two hours are no longer free (I was there from 11 to 1 and it cost 6 bucks). Also be prepared that the car slips are tight. If you have a Fiat, fine, if you have a big car, might take some maneuvering. You can always Take The Metro into town. Or ride your bike. I don't have a bike, nor can I ever imagine getting one. But that's because I value my life.

As for the Eggslut line, yeah, it kind of blows. It's rare you'll only be on line for 15 minutes. Don't do Eggslut if you're starving or if you do, over-order. You won't regret it. But if you can't wait, and you're in the market, I recommend Berlin Currywurst. It's right next to Eggslut. Yummy German Sausage shack that first emerged in Silver Lake on Sunset. Best fries in the city (in my humble opine) and created by real Berliners. Yummeriffic.

Enjoy!

Self-Care in The City of Angels

The other day I had a bit of a blow up, meltdown, implosion. It sucked. Lying in bed crying is a great thing to do when you're miserable... FOR A LITTLE WHILE... but it's nothing to make a habit of, especially when you live in one of the best cities in the world for those in need to recover from feeling rejected.

Peg Entwhistle

Unless I'm wrong, poor Peg Entwhistle was the first actress to take a leap off The Hollywood Sign. I'm not going to say if she went to Whole Foods, meditated at The Vedanta Temple and got a massage from Nikom at The Raven things would have been different...

But really, a little self-care goes a long way in a city that thrives on chewing you up and spitting you out.

Sometimes Hollywood feels downright depressing

Because as a writer, actress, director, musician -- you have to know rejection is a part of it. And you do develop a thick skin but that skin has to be immersed and infused with oils, scrubbed down with salts, moisturized with Nightingale poop, plumped up with fillers and kissed all over by the force of the universe to be fully appreciated no matter what, in order to deal with all that is putting its grubby little hands over it.

Yep, sounds like someone had a bad day. So my first stop in trying to feel better -- oh wait, my first stop was a cheeseburger at The Oaks Gourmet in Hollywood.

My little friend, Nancy, met me there. I didn't take any pictures. You wouldn't want to see what I did to this burger or what I looked like in this moment in time. Oh, the best is I say to the incredibly handsome guy at the checkout register (everyone there is incredibly handsome or super-chick-hot -- I kind of think it's a pre-req to getting a gig there) that I'd like a burger, medium rare, no this or that, etc. etc. And then I go, "You know what? I'm emotionally eating. Can I have the Greek Salad as well?" Their Greek Salad is SO good. It has mint and is light and not too onion-y and tastes fresh - really fresh. Like the tomatoes are tomatoes I'd choose. Anyway, he goes, "So, not the burger, just the salad?" And I go "No, I said, I'm emotionally eating. So both. Thank you!" He was too hot and skinny to have any idea what I meant but smiled like the good young optimistic sport he was.

Kirsten Dunst at The Oaks Gourmet (kind of like me & Nancy)

Nancy's like my trudging bud. She knows my pain. She ALWAYS makes me laugh. And if every day I could meet her at The Oaks and eat a burger, one of the best in Hollywood, that would be heaven. No, come on. That would be disgusting. I'd have a major cholesterol problem. Okay. Moving on.

I went home, cried and lied around and listened to my meditation mp3. It's this woman, Micaela Boehm from Vienna (I decided that. I don't actually know where she's from). She's a hypnotist I saw years ago and I still listen to the recording she made for me.  I put on my eye mask, lie down, and press play. She goes So now to begin with I want you to make yourself very comfortable. And just allow your body to sink down, into the soft service, adjusting your body so that you can rest for a few moments, allowing your body to... rest... your mind to drift aimlessly... effortlessly... drifting from thought to thought... while your body begins to sink down... feeling all the stress and tension of your day... and letting yourself sink down... unwind...slow now...as you... drift...float...flow... I don't know what else she says because I immediately fall asleep every time.

Then two of my closest friends checked in. I was "called to action" and met up with Else & Stephanie who let me cry like a colicky baby and got me to laugh at myself.

My Real Housewives Companions, Else & Stephanie

These are the guys I can say the straight dope to and they're kind enough to remind me I'm not always such a downer. They're pretty awesome and I started to feel like people did like me and my Stuart Smalley self was gonna be okay.

Doggone it, people like me!

But the next morning when I woke up, with swollen eyelids, I was kind of like, Wow, people don't like me.

I knew I could just feel sorry for myself for endless pointless hours or I could get into action. Trust me, feeling sorry for myself can be like a super ugly default and a job unto itself. But I chose to do otherwise. First stop?

Meditation at the Vedanta Temple in The Hollywood Hills.

The Vedanta Society of Southern California

This is SUCH an unassuming place. It's tucked away on this teensy street right above Hollywood, off of Vine. It's located in one of the oldest, smallest, and most charming enclaves of LA, The Hollywood Dell, where all the houses look like craftsman cabins where magical elves live.

I forgot to get good pictures of this area so here's someone's garage across from The Temple

So peaceful, unpopulated, beautiful, mellow. I went into the temple, pulled up a cushion, and started to meditate. It felt good. I was at ease. I felt so peaceful and quiet.

And then this lady walked in. 

Wasn't sure if it would be frowned upon to take pictures but sometimes being subversive makes me feel better.

She kept moving around. I don't know why. I was trying to think of nothing but sometimes would slightly open my left eyelid to peek over and make sure she wasn't doing something weird. She wasn't. She was just fidgety. I was like that on a plane once to Barcelona. I was sharing a bunch of seats with some woman and I couldn't get comfortable and I kept moving around and she goes, Settle down! and I was like paralyzed for the rest of the flight and didn't sleep one wink. I didn't say sharply Settle down! to this fidgety lady in the temple. I like to think of myself as evolved and she left before my meditation time was up. Oh, that was the other thing. I set my timer on my phone to meditate. Then when she came in, I felt completely like I should turn it off and couldn't stop obsessing over that. I was so relieved when she left. If that lady is reading this, Thank you, Lady!

Hug a tree at The Vedanta Center in Hollywood

Afterwards, I had to go to the dentist. Let's not get into that shit, although I will say, I have the best dentist EVER and he's super nice and travels all over the world and takes incredible pictures. If you need a dentist, look up Dr. Kurtz in Glendale. He rocks (and he likes rocks).

Then off to Whole Foods. My friend, Dina, who is an integrative nutritionist and has a company called Well Is Good reminded me that good food makes me feel better. She's ALWAYS right and besides, I wanted to spend money but spend it productively in a safe atmosphere. So I went to adult Disneyland, otherwise known as Whole Foods, The Happiest Place on Earth (including Bed, Bath & Beyond).

Whole Foods on Arroyo Parkway

Either you hate or love Whole Foods. I get it. I've been there. But right now, I wish I lived in this place. And the one on Arroyo Parkway, which is like award winning and everyone knows it's super nice, is filled with magic beans and good vibes. I mean look at this guy...

Pat, The Sandwich King

I am not kidding. This kid is like a freakin genius. He knows sandwiches and I'm a sandwich maven/snob. If you're at Whole Foods and need a sammy, I pray for you that Pat's working. That's all I can say.

And this lady? I live for this lady. She is SO nice to me. Every time. I will wait in line so I can see her. She always has a nice thing to say and anyway, she's like one of those people that reminds me people are good and nice and nothing really matters. And she always has a nice extra touch, like super fantastic earrings. She's like Flor at Von's in Eagle Rock who usually has a flower in her hair and Dorothy at Gelson's in Hollywood who ALWAYS remembers you.

Add caption

But Whole Foods, there's just something special about really good food.

Just found out the Salmon is on sale this Friday for $8.99 per lb.

I don't drink and I don't smoke.

Food is what I got. So trust me, I am going to make the most of it.

Save a cow, eat a pumpkin!

And as good as all that was, no journey towards feeling better about yourself is complete, in my humble opinion, without a massage. LA has a billion choices from excellent super cheap (like Pho Siam on the edge of downtown) to uber dripping in indulgence shmance (like The Spa in Beverly Hills at The Four Seasons). For me though, when I'm really in need, when I don't want to compromise, but I can't justify spending a car payment (or worse) on a massage, I go visit Nikom at The Raven in Silverlake: My all-time favorite massage maybe on the planet.

This guy is a master.  A true master. The guy who owns the place, Barry, took extra care when he hired his staff. Some people are just healers and Nikom is one of those men. I got The Custom (where you discuss what ails you and the masseuse tailors his/her massage to fit your needs). I scheduled an hour, which is $100.00. Now that's not the most expensive massage you'll get but it's not really cheap either. I was splurging. I was going all out. And I'm SO glad I did. Because I noticed he was going over an hour. I was surprised. Now I had called just an hour before to schedule this and might have miscommunicated how long I wanted my massage. That's what I thought had happened until I went to the receptionist to settle up. She said he went over because he felt I needed it! Can you imagine? They still charged me $100.00 but he was generous because HE IS A HEALER!

But first, let me tell you, you walk in and it's like you're suddenly in Bali or something.

And the whole place reeks of sage, and I love this smell. I know to some people it's pot-adjacent but I love love love...

Native Sage, 10 bucks, at The Raven in Silverlake

It's the whole place that heals you. Every little thing...

Massage Beds at The Raven

The Main Area

Inside my massage room

You know, I can't remember how I first came across Nikom. Was it through my friend, Amanda, or did we both find him around the same time? I can't remember. All I know is when the going gets tough, the tough, battered, bruised, sad and emo -- if they're smart -- go to Nikom.

And that's it! That's what it took to feel okay, ready to take on the world, cease the self-pity party. I should say, that's what it took this time. Trust me, I have a lot in my quiver to nurse a bruised ego. Because I live here. I like it here. I'm not going anywhere. I'm going to keep trying, persevering and I have to know that rolling with the punches requires some extra TLC.

But man, I wish I had chosen some profession in the self-care industry instead of wanting to be a writer.

I would be really rich right now, right?

The Vedanta Society (Hollywood Temple) which also offers classes, lectures, meditations and private meetings with their head swami is located at 1946 Vedanta Place, Hollywood, CA 90068. It's open from 6 AM to 7 PM Every Day.  Park on Vine for free but always check the signs.

My favorite Whole Foods is at 465 South Arroyo Parkway, Pasadena, CA 91105. Parking underneath the market.

The Raven Spa of Silverlake is located at 2910 Rowena Avenue, Silverlake, CA 90039. 323.644.0240. Street Parking Available. Always feed your meter extra since you want to relax after! They also have a yoga studio you should check out. In addition, they have a Raven in Santa Monica (I don't know it that well) as well as El Leon in WeHo which I haven't visited for a long time but when I did I absolutely LOVED it.

Enjoy!

My Favorite Salad

Just have to make a quick and fast recommendation for one of my favorite salads. Actually it's one of my favorite lunch spots.

On Sunset, just a couple of blocks east of Silverlake Boulevard, sandwiched between Sumi's and Hemingway & Pickett, is Food + Lab. Now there's another Food + Lab in West Hollywood, and that one is fine, but this is the one I love and I can't for the life of me say there's any real major difference aside from the fact that...

...it's in Silverlake.

Food + Lab is simple. Good food. Fresh food. Well prepared. But also the entire place is clean and mellow. New York tiled, metal but comf chairs and and I'm a big fan of the mirror and the artwork and hanging-low light fixtures:

There aren't that many restaurants where I feel I can really think. I can be alone and it's okay. This though is one of them. And though it has delicious sammys...

Grilled Cheese with Kale Salad at Food + Lab

...tons of sides like kale salad and white bean salad, and Deluscious Cookies (which are at the counter and just trust me you should get one, they are fabulous) the reason I go is for one reason and one reason alone.

The Cobb Salad at Food + Lab

This is my favorite salad: The Chicken Cobb. Grilled chicken, yummy little tomatoes, spring lettuce, gorgonzola. It comes with 1 dressing but I ask for two and mix them because they're both AMAZING. They're not fattening, they whip the dressing so they taste rich and have a silky texure and it's a salad and who cares? One is the House Vinaigrette, the other, Lemon. The salad comes with bacon and egg but I don't get either. I feel indulgent with the bacon and I dislike cooked egg. So for me they usually just throw in some more of something like the cheese or the avocado or the tomato. Doesn't matter to me which component is added because they're all so good and the chicken, seriously, is grilled to perfection, charred - a hint of salt. So tasty Tom Colicchio (and it's his voice I hear in my head when I bite into it) would say, "The chicken is cooked perfectly."

Grilled Veggie Salad. Which is good too. But it isn't the Cobb.

They have other salads too, obviously. They can't just serve one. Like they have the extremely popular grilled veggie with goat cheese but I likes what I likes and you'll rarely see me diverge from my original setting.

While you're on the block, it's worth going to the places that align Food + Lab. They're both good little stores -- though one is about to move. Sumi's is going to Vermont which is a shame but they're there for now and the handmade jewelry is really lovely.

UPDATE: SUMI'S HAS MOVED TO 1812 NORTH VERMONT, LA, CA 90027.

Sumi sells both some of her own designs, some of local designers. Very tasteful stuff and a close friend actually got her wedding ring here. 

Wrapped Necklace at Sumi $143

Classy and simple Rose Gold Earrings, designed by Sumi $46

There are also these very cute handmade Carita Viola bags from Finland, tons of artwork and pretty little knick knacks. 

Gorgeous scarf at Sumi $22

On the other side of Food + Lab is Hemingway & Pickett. Also a totally charming and unique store.

$12 for the pair of Territorial Beer Holders

Awesome retro clocks by Bruno. $55.

Terra Nova Natur Oil, 10 bucks.

Original cards.

They're great places. Probably worth the trip alone. But for me, it's very clear why I'm coming to this stretch of land...

Food + Lab is open for breakfast, lunch, dinner and caters. Hours are 10 to 9 on weekdays, 9 to 9 on weekends. It's located at 3206 West Sunset Boulevard, Los Angeles 90026. Metered parking is available on Sunset, free side street parking is also worth the hunt but as always, check the signs. 323.661.2666. Their other location is 7253 Santa Monica Boulevard, West Hollywood 90046. Hours are 8-8 daily. There's metered parking on Santa Monica and free parking available in the back. 323.851.7120.

Sumi's is at 3204 Sunset. 1812 North Vermont, LA, CA 90027. Monday thru Saturday 10-8. Sundays 11-6. 323.660.0869.

Hemingway & Pickett is at 3208 Sunset. Tuesday thru Saturday, 11-7. Sunday and Monday, 11-5. 323.660.4200.